Letter to a Supervisor

Lise,

You have indeed always tried to help me, but usually your help is very accusatory. You frame all the problems like they are not your fault, and then keep this air of superiority when explaining the situation. I also hear that you complain to the office about how you have to deal with me. That's certainly not very polite.

You need to realize that the people you work with are all as intelligent and capable as you are. They understand the duties required of them and the way in which they do their work. You don't need to explain at length how they should finish an assignment. You hired these people so you should trust their judgment.

You should also keep a detailed account of what tasks you assign people, because you often forget. This banking issue was a perfect example. True, the school paid me my full severance. I am glad there was proof. Still, I specifically asked you to put all my severance into my KEB account. You and I sat down, and I read my account number to you. We had an entire meeting about it. Unfortunately, as it happened, you didn't relay that information to school, and I had no way to directly access the money once it was given to me. I had to FedEx my bank card to Hana, and from there I had to rely on other people to do my banking for me. The whole ordeal cost me considerable time and money, and it all could have been avoided if you would have remembered a very important piece of information as I gave it to you. And this is just the banking matter. If we wanted to delve into the excess curriculum work that we had to do throughout the year because you often forgot what you instructed us to do in the first place, we could write a ton more emails.

But we should leave the matter as it is. I appreciate you taking the time to handle this banking mix-up. In general you were an agreeable supervisor and a vast improvement upon your predecessor. I do wish you the best of luck with your career. After talking to you, it seems that you have your future well-figured. I hope it goes as you planned. Please, just remember--the people that work for you are intelligent and capable. Allow them to use their own faculties to complete the tasks you assign them. Make sure, moreover, that you are clear and concise with your assignments and that you remember exactly what it is that you assigned. I believe that's absolutely crucial to professional supervision.

Enjoy the school year,

Micah

A Glorious Return and Some Ground Rules

Welcome back to school, Children. It’s time for language lab.

Before you enter the lab, please keep in mind these simple rules.

First of all, you need to remember that I, in my infinite capacity as teacher, have complete access to the network. I have a screen before me that shows all the computers in the lab and gives me access to any screen, at any time. Every one of your computer stations has a number on it, and with a click I can bring up your number and your screen, in real time. Put simply, what you see, I see.

That said, every student needs to begin their work immediately. When you enter the lab, make sure you find your seat, log on, and get started on the lesson right away. Please don’t waste time at the beginning of the class tending to such personal business as chatting with your boyfriend. In this regard, your school email address is the same as your cellular telephone: they are not allowed in class. I know you just HAVE to talk your boyfriend right now, but don’t worry. I’m sure he can wait to say in person “nuttin’ much; just bored in study hall thinking of you baby”.

Please also remember—and I’m looking at you, Casey—that I have a greater perception of the classroom than you realize. I CAN see and hear you, even if you are quietly trying to hide behind the partition of your computer. I KNOW you and Contessa are not doing your work because I can SEE you, plain as day, leaning towards each other and talking. And that begs the question, Why try to fake your work at all? I can still look at your computer screen and see that it’s not moving. I can still tell that you haven’t made any progress. True, you have your “french2bodyparts” scores up, but let’s be honest with each other—when the results from Le Visage don’t move in 10 minutes, I know you’re wasting time. You also shouldn’t audibly tell Contessa how you were “like, freaking out” the last time you were at Kinzie’s house. That’s a dead giveaway.

Finally, remember that it is time neither for your jokes nor your personal information. I am a substitute, after all, and while you might think it funny to leave a message in MS Word on your screen to say “Hello!! Thank you for subbing for my class today!!”, the chances of getting a reaction from me are very slim. I am a poised and professional educator, and there is no way with my skill and control I would react to such a move.

That said, I also don’t need to see your private, personal data. Please wait until after class to check your grades. This is specifically for you, Jazmyne, because I don’t need to see the 40% you got on your “Cowboy Frontier Text Reading” or the 0% on your “Gas Lab Behavior”. You should respect me and yourself by keeping that information confidential.

And, Jazmyne, as long as I have your attention, let me just say that now is not the time for you and Reneisha to be checking out the quotes from your favorite ghetto comedy. Yes, I know Menace II Society was a fine film, but now is the time for French practice. If you want to highlight the dialogue between O-Dog, Caine and A-Wax as they debated the legitimacy of their late-night drive-by, do it on your own time. I know it’s a poignant scene that really explores man’s desire to murder children, but not in language lab. That can wait until you get home.



So that’s all for now. You can go ahead and find your seats. Remember to save all work on the “Students server”, in the “Language Lab” folder. If you need to get your printing from Workroom 1, please get a pass from me. Ok, get started.

NOTE TO TEACHERS: Using the screen monitoring technology really is a lot of fun. One piece of advice, though, to save yourself lots of unnecessary time: go straight for the sluts. If you want the best and juiciest tidbits, look for the trashiest and sluttiest students in class. They are the students most likely to get off-topic, and whatever they do look at usually doesn’t disappoint.

Enjoy this lab time. You really do have complete control. Like O-Dog would say, “Shit, nigga, I'll smoke anybody, nigga. I just don't give a fuck. Shit. I'm gonna hit this shit, nigger.”